Customers Don't Care

In one of my writings I made the comment that customers don't really care about your problems. They don't want to hear about your excuses. They are not interested in your woes.

It doesn't make them callous or heatless, it just means that when a person or company hires someone to provide entertainment, that is really all they want to get out of the transaction. They usually aren't looking to get wrapped up in your soap opera.

A birthday party mother wants to celebrate her child's birthday, not mourn the break-up of her kid's magician. A corporate event planner wants to pull off a fun evening for the group and isn't the least bit interested in hearing about your impending divorce and how your soon-to-be-ex caused you to show up thirty minutes late. They just want their show and they want it with a smile.

This point was really brought home to me when a friend of mine from Georgia called recently to tell me about a mutual friend of ours who heard, quite unexpectedly that his wife had contracted cancer and it was in the later stages. They gave her less than a month to wrap things up. It turned out that was an over-estimate and she just passed away yesterday.

So several professional performers in the Atlanta area contacted the performer and agreed to not only cover his engagements, but to allow him to keep the money from the shows. When he was told on Thursday that his wife would probably not last through the weekend he called them up on their offer.

So this friend of mine called the clients and explained the situation and informed them that rather than abandon them, he would be filling in for the party, honoring the previously agreed upon fee.

And here is where it gets weird, even for someone as jaded as I can sometimes be.

One of the clients asked if she was going to get a discount for the show since she had contracted for two performers (the husband and wife worked as a team). My friend told her that he normally charged more than the agreed upon fee, but that he was honoring it. Still, rather than fight about it, he agreed to lower the fee to about half of what he normally performs for, with the intention of pulling the difference from his own pocket so that the original performer would not know about it.

In other words, my buddy is going to go in, do a show with no compensation and then reach into his own pocket and pull out another $50 to fill in the shortcoming of this woman who wants to re-negotiate a fee with a man who is watching his wife and business partner die in his arms.

But it gets worse. As he's driving to the show he gets word that his friend's wife has lost her fight. But the show must go on and he arrives at the house, does the show to the delight of the kids in attendance.

After my friend finishes the show the lady hands him an envelope with his payment. When he got to the car and opened the envelope it contained a $20 bill. He went back up to the house and asked what it was.

"That's your tip. You did a fantastic job."

"Thank you. What about the payment?"

"I'm not paying. I contracted for a clown and you weren't a clown, you did a magic show."

"I know. I'm sorry. The clown you hired just died of cancer. Of course, they didn't have to provide anything at all. They could have just called and told you they weren't showing up. But they tried. I'm sorry she picked such an inconvenient time to die. As you can imagine this is even more troubling for her husband than it is for you. But why don't you keep this money, you obviously need it more than I do."

"Julian," he told me later, "I had to leave because I was afraid if I stayed even a minute longer I would have ended up in jail. I was so disgusted with this lady's complete disregard for what had just happened."

And it gets even worse.

The lady actually got on the phone and called the original performer to leave a message on his answering machine to tell him how unhappy she was with the service.

Just what a man who has lost his wife needs to deal with.

In memory of Gleeka the Clown. Our hearts, thoughts, and prayers are with you Aragorn.